[Merriment needs a crash course in how to deal with teenagers. For a moment, he thinks about telling Sasuke "no", but…maybe he's just a little soft-hearted and figures there's nothing to lose.]
…I spent so many years wondering who I was and why I was brought back. I didn't have any of my memories, and nobody would ever answer me when I asked. When I joined the others, I found a way to get my memories back and figure out who I was. But some things happened and other things became a priority to help one of us before she disappeared. And then we had to make sure another one of us had everything together for Easter. Making eggs, making sure they would get out of the warren without being attacked…I was the most powerful of all of us, so it was my job to guard the warren and protect the eggs to make sure they got to the surface.
I got distracted though when the thing that I wanted was presented right in front of my face. It lured me away and I thought I'd have time to get in and out. A quick detour. Get what I wanted, get back to help the others.
…it was a trap. Nightmares attacked the warren and ruined Easter while I wasn't there. I put somebody else in danger of being forgotten because of it. Everything was a mess and I put everybody at a risk of fading away from existence.
So I left. Went after the guy who tricked me. Lost the fight anyway, but got what I wanted, technically. Sometimes I gotta wonder at what cost though.
[It doesn't make sense in some places, but the overall encounter... is familiar. Recently at home, things had become more messy for Sasuke. But before... back when he had been a part of a team... back when he was getting better, when he was so close to making an unbreakable friendship with two of the most important people to him...
He remembers, craving that one thing about him. The strength to finally beat Itachi, the eyes he needed to beat Itachi, to learn what he thought he knew was the truth. He put the others are risk. He left, and he thought... too... they wouldn't want him back.
Why would they when he had tried to hurt them so much?]
You... [He isn't sure what to say. He's not good with advice, and he's even worse with sympathy.
What he does want to say feels hypocritical.] You regret it?
[It's about what he expected, so he lets Sasuke work out an answer for himself.]
...yeah. I really, really do. [He moves then, lining up with the cue ball to knock his four astray into a side pocket.] But I can't really take it back now. My own weapon was broken and I disappeared before I got the call to ascend to become...well, this.
I took it because I had nowhere else to go. But even now I wish I'd been able to try and fix everything.
i can't believe fucking jack and sasuke get along with shit in common stop
[Now he's just confused. He knows what he wants to do, what he thinks he needs to do, but then having someone just advice him with personal experience... Damn, what does this guy know? Nothing.
Merriment can't understand.]
If you could fix it... What would you do?
[Sasuke carefully sets up for a shot, but there isn't any clear path to get something in. He has to use the cue ball to knock one of Merriment's out of the way, a little further up the table from the pocket.]
me literally from their first thread. suffer with me, thanks
[Merriment sure doesn't understand a damn thing about destroying everything that gave him a bit of happiness because his goals got in the way and he became short-sighted.]
…first thing's first? Damage control. Lots of damage control to try and buy some time before everything was destroyed. Then I'd apologize to the people I hurt and not expect forgiveness but help them anyway. My fault, my mess to fix.
And then? Go after the guy who wanted to destroy everything and take back what's mine. […] They said it wasn't my fault for letting someone else get destroyed, but if I'd been better, maybe it wouldn't have happened. I have to make up for that, too. [He's watching Sasuke assess the table.]
…I got so used to working alone that I think I freaked out a little at working with other people. But now that I've experienced that, I'm not sure I could go back to working by myself. It was nice, you know? Having people trust me. Being more than an irresponsible nuisance.
I don't think I'll get that chance. But other people can. [i.e. you, Sasuke. But he won't force a decision either way.] …as Guardians we were supposed to help protect people. I said I wasn't good at it, but eventually I think I was. I just didn't see it until it was too late.
im literally trying so hard to make him go turbo and you're ruining my PLANS
[Honestly? He thinks about Naruto. (When doesn't he, though.)
The orange idiot who just keeps trying so damn hard to "save" him, and he cant get why. After everything he's done. After boldly proclaiming his self-destructive goals. Come back, Sasuke; We can do it together, Sasuke; We won't give up on you, Sasuke.
His face pinches stubbornly, then falls. He hadn't ever been good at it either, he thinks.
He doesn't lean up from the table. Instead, he punts one of Merriment's balls with the cue stick so it hits the 8 ball and sends it into the closest pocket, knocking several of the other remaining balls out of the way. He straightens, frowning, and he sets the cue stick on the edge of the table.]
I was waiting... in the Valley before I came here. For Naruto. It would be our third true fight, the final fight. I planned to kill him... as my last remaining friend. He was the one who was left standing in my way.
[It's the end of the game, but Merriment holds onto the cue and leans against it a little. He looks comfortable, like he's used to this, and he considers Sasuke's words carefully.]
Why do you think that is? ...even after everything, why do you think he never gave up?
[He looks away, confused, as if he isn't sure he knows. Or maybe... he knows too well. He knows very well why. He just doesn't want to think about it, he doesn't want to accept that reason because he tried to give it up to get things done.]
Usuratonkachi...
[That damn fool. He thought, coming here, he'd escape someone like that, like Naruto. Surely there can only be one idiot with a never-ending spirit.]
He's such a damn nuisance. I don't... understand why he won't just... give up. I tried... After everything I've done. Just like... all the idiots here...
Maybe they're not the idiots here, Sasuke. [Casually...] You can't always shake people with unending faith. It could be the end of the world and some people will still believe in you. Sometimes they see things in you you can't even see for yourself.
The glare he gives Merriment lacks most of the heat he's capable of offering. It is weird. It's extremely weird. It's weird, and Sasuke hates it.]
He's wasting time! He's wasting... He was the one who wanted to become Hokage. He's wasting time he could be trying to become Hokage by getting in my way. [Sasuke Uchiha held Naruto back this whole time.] Just like the others here.
The time they could spend trying to figure out how to help the rest of you, they're wasting it on bothering me!
[What the fuck is a Hokage? Merriment's just not going to ask.]
Can you call it a waste of time if it's their decision to make? [There's a shrug and he leans against the billiard table.] ...I always thought North was wasting time on me, too. Turns out that wasn't my decision to make.
[YES. Which he shows by huffing sharply, but quietly under his breath and turning around, almost like he's leaving. But he doesn't move away from the table, instead balling a fist and setting it on the polished edge.
If it didn't matter, you'd be able to answer. [But...okay.] People make things a little complicated. But sometimes it may be worth listening to them anyway.
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no subject
…I spent so many years wondering who I was and why I was brought back. I didn't have any of my memories, and nobody would ever answer me when I asked. When I joined the others, I found a way to get my memories back and figure out who I was. But some things happened and other things became a priority to help one of us before she disappeared. And then we had to make sure another one of us had everything together for Easter. Making eggs, making sure they would get out of the warren without being attacked…I was the most powerful of all of us, so it was my job to guard the warren and protect the eggs to make sure they got to the surface.
I got distracted though when the thing that I wanted was presented right in front of my face. It lured me away and I thought I'd have time to get in and out. A quick detour. Get what I wanted, get back to help the others.
…it was a trap. Nightmares attacked the warren and ruined Easter while I wasn't there. I put somebody else in danger of being forgotten because of it. Everything was a mess and I put everybody at a risk of fading away from existence.
So I left. Went after the guy who tricked me. Lost the fight anyway, but got what I wanted, technically. Sometimes I gotta wonder at what cost though.
closes my eyes i knew
He remembers, craving that one thing about him. The strength to finally beat Itachi, the eyes he needed to beat Itachi, to learn what he thought he knew was the truth. He put the others are risk. He left, and he thought... too... they wouldn't want him back.
Why would they when he had tried to hurt them so much?]
You... [He isn't sure what to say. He's not good with advice, and he's even worse with sympathy.
What he does want to say feels hypocritical.] You regret it?
sparkles gently hey i hate this btw
...yeah. I really, really do. [He moves then, lining up with the cue ball to knock his four astray into a side pocket.] But I can't really take it back now. My own weapon was broken and I disappeared before I got the call to ascend to become...well, this.
I took it because I had nowhere else to go. But even now I wish I'd been able to try and fix everything.
i can't believe fucking jack and sasuke get along with shit in common stop
Merriment can't understand.]
If you could fix it... What would you do?
[Sasuke carefully sets up for a shot, but there isn't any clear path to get something in. He has to use the cue ball to knock one of Merriment's out of the way, a little further up the table from the pocket.]
me literally from their first thread. suffer with me, thanks
…first thing's first? Damage control. Lots of damage control to try and buy some time before everything was destroyed. Then I'd apologize to the people I hurt and not expect forgiveness but help them anyway. My fault, my mess to fix.
And then? Go after the guy who wanted to destroy everything and take back what's mine. […] They said it wasn't my fault for letting someone else get destroyed, but if I'd been better, maybe it wouldn't have happened. I have to make up for that, too. [He's watching Sasuke assess the table.]
…I got so used to working alone that I think I freaked out a little at working with other people. But now that I've experienced that, I'm not sure I could go back to working by myself. It was nice, you know? Having people trust me. Being more than an irresponsible nuisance.
I don't think I'll get that chance. But other people can. [i.e. you, Sasuke. But he won't force a decision either way.] …as Guardians we were supposed to help protect people. I said I wasn't good at it, but eventually I think I was. I just didn't see it until it was too late.
im literally trying so hard to make him go turbo and you're ruining my PLANS
The orange idiot who just keeps trying so damn hard to "save" him, and he cant get why. After everything he's done. After boldly proclaiming his self-destructive goals. Come back, Sasuke; We can do it together, Sasuke; We won't give up on you, Sasuke.
His face pinches stubbornly, then falls. He hadn't ever been good at it either, he thinks.
He doesn't lean up from the table. Instead, he punts one of Merriment's balls with the cue stick so it hits the 8 ball and sends it into the closest pocket, knocking several of the other remaining balls out of the way. He straightens, frowning, and he sets the cue stick on the edge of the table.]
I was waiting... in the Valley before I came here. For Naruto. It would be our third true fight, the final fight. I planned to kill him... as my last remaining friend. He was the one who was left standing in my way.
Trying to stop me. Never giving up.
I ASKED FOR NONE OF THIS...
Why do you think that is? ...even after everything, why do you think he never gave up?
no subject
[He looks away, confused, as if he isn't sure he knows. Or maybe... he knows too well. He knows very well why. He just doesn't want to think about it, he doesn't want to accept that reason because he tried to give it up to get things done.]
Usuratonkachi...
[That damn fool. He thought, coming here, he'd escape someone like that, like Naruto. Surely there can only be one idiot with a never-ending spirit.]
He's such a damn nuisance. I don't... understand why he won't just... give up. I tried... After everything I've done. Just like... all the idiots here...
no subject
Weird, isn't it?
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The glare he gives Merriment lacks most of the heat he's capable of offering. It is weird. It's extremely weird. It's weird, and Sasuke hates it.]
He's wasting time! He's wasting... He was the one who wanted to become Hokage. He's wasting time he could be trying to become Hokage by getting in my way. [Sasuke Uchiha held Naruto back this whole time.] Just like the others here.
The time they could spend trying to figure out how to help the rest of you, they're wasting it on bothering me!
no subject
Can you call it a waste of time if it's their decision to make? [There's a shrug and he leans against the billiard table.] ...I always thought North was wasting time on me, too. Turns out that wasn't my decision to make.
Are you really that bothered by them?
no subject
He hangs his head a moment.]
Getting in my way... just means they'll get hurt.
no subject
...you don't want to hurt those particular people, do you. [Not even really a question, just a fact.]
no subject
That doesn't matter.
[Which is to say YES.]
no subject
no subject
Maybe. [He doesn't quite look back over his shoulder.] Next time, we'll finish the game.
no subject
Sure thing. See you next time.