[Here are some things that are the worst: all the hoops that Senri and Sasuke had to go to finally get even a modicum of attention from Indulgence, who has now seen fit to make them drag their asses all the way back to the Parlor, which is not even his own room, who is lounging on top of the piano like some kind of starlet, and has one leg in the air.
Oh, but there's more, because when Indulgence sees Sasuke, he lets out a bleat of laughter.]
Ha! What happened to you? You look like a cat that's just been unwillingly assaulted by a groomer. [He points a lazy hand at Senri.] Aaaand I'm guessing you would be that groomer.
senri has no fucking clue how this happened. he wishes he had even the slightest understanding. he was actually decently nervous but now he's just
losing his goddamn mind in laughter because dragging sasuke is his favorite olympic sport, and then he grins back at the god before giving a dramatic bow as if he was on a stage]
Immediately, Sasuke regrets this and, immediately, he wants to leave. One hand balls into a fist at his side. His expression is utterly sour, not matching the fitted and sleek outfit Senri managed to con him into.
Lifting a foot, he shoves it against Senri's ass in hopes the orange idiot ends up on the ground.] Knock it off, idiot. [Stop helping the god make fun of him?!?! WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON, SENRI NITO.]
[Everything is regrets right now as Indulgence, maybe reluctantly, puts that absolutely twinkish leg down and swings his body until he's sitting on the edge of the piano instead of lounging across it.]
Well, you had the right idea, just don't worry about being so stuffy next time. Looks only impress me if you're trying to get me in the sack and, gotta tell you, not feeling it here.
[Everyone is using slang he doesn't understand..............
Also, yeah, this is very fake. Cursed fake. Sasuke gives Senri a Look that clearly says Sycophant. Why is he stuck with the boke part of the duo.] He isn't stupid, Nito. [Maybe he's stupid? What does Sasuke know.] Talk to him normally.
[Geez. He glances back at Indulgence, so glad the god stopped posing with the twink leg.]
Well, whoever you're thinking of is undoubtedly handsome, clever, and incredibly well-endowed.
[He means that not in the way it comes out but I mean, uh, whatever. Suddenly, Indulgence has one of the bottles of alcohol that had been pilfered as an offering from this very Parlor and is trying very hard to wrench the cork out of it.]
[ . . . . he's fucking stupid. senri glances sasuke a look to be like 'no, he's fucking stupid'. and then hums a happy note, careful not to make it into an actual melody]
I'll help with that, super charming and endlessly gracious, Indulgence-san!
[he's going to like. go back to the bar and get a bottle opener? dude,]
Fire away, Uchiha. [and he shoots sasuke a look] Respectfully.
[Unfortunately, Indulgence gets none of this from Sasuke.]
Nevermind. He’s stupid.
[Well. Failed the first go.
Sasuke regrets being stuck between these two idiots. Naruto! is! enough! Why does he have Senri and Indulgence, too?] What kind of world are you planning to create if you win? [Actually... he doesn’t think he wants to know. He really doesn’t want to know at all. He is already preparing himself to hear some kind of bullshit.]
[Oh, rip. Well, that caught Indulgence's attention but like, in a really horrible way.]
Excuse me? You might wanna speak up, I'm reasonably hard of hearing under this mask, because I'm preeetty sure we're throwing names around that aren't altogether called for. Now, considering you wanted to see me, I'm guessing that's not the case. Am I right?
he's never found something as quickly as he found the corkscrew in the bar so that he can book it back over, bowing his head even as he approaches and senri thinks again about how much he hates rich people, he thinks about how much he hates snobs like this but that doesn't read on his face for even a second as he speaks up - ]
Pardon my brief interruption but -
You're suuuuper right, Indulgence-san! I'm sure he was talking about me, he calls me stupid all the time.
There's no way that he could've been referring to you, someone so great and powerful that you could probably strike us where we stand. [HEAR THAT, SASUKE] Not that you would - you're so kind and generous, I'm sure!
[his internal monologue is just AAAAAAAAAAAAAA ftr]
[Sasuke’s face darkens. He probably would have let it go if it wasn’t for Senri. But the posturing—he hates it. He hates seeing it on Senri more than he hates having to wear this awful outfit and stand in front of this awful god. And he feels bad? Senri had been right. Indulgence was snobby.]
No. [Reaching out, he bunches his fingers into the back of Senri’s clothes and yanks Senri upright.] I was talking to you. [did you forget he fought a god senri rip] You’re just a god. I’m not going to pretend like I owe you anything. Nito doesn’t owe you anything either. All of you owe us. We agreed to play your game for you. Without us, you would be squabbling amongst yourselves like chickens.
I’m returning the respect I received when I came in. I can do this easy, but I won’t kiss your feet. [He finally releases Senri’s clothes.] Nito wanted to see you, but you wouldn’t answer him, so I agreed to help. I don’t care either way. So answer Nito’s questions, and I won’t say another word.
[Indulgence's voice loses the playfulness it had had not too long ago, one foot drumming against his knee.]
I don't know what kind of lies your friend here's been filling your head with, but believe you me, this is the first time I've ever received an offering from either of you.
[Suddenly, he jumps down to his feet on the floor, shoving his hands into folds in his robes.]
Go ahead and talk a big game, but let's not make up stories.
[Slowly, his eyes cut to the back of Senri's head. He wishes he wouldn't have let go, and then he could have fisted his hand again as a threat. Remind him to kill Senri once this is all over.]
Later. [Low enough to hopefully make Senri's blood crawl.] Ask them anyway. [He said he wouldn't say anything else and, for now, he holds true to his promise. Countdown to the next time Sasuke gets mad and talks.]
I'll tell you what. Now that we've gotten the narrative a bit straighter, how about you cut the bullshit? I'm not in the mood for good cop, bad cop, so spit it out before I get bored and I'll consider answering your questions.
[Indulgence taps a foot, like one step away from judge judy giffing.]
the first is a bone-deep panic that the second he walks out of here he's going to get stabbed so fucking fast.
the second is oh my god i fucking hate rich people
but he does take a second to choose his words carefully, trying to keep a pulse of truth in them without over the top flattery]
.... it's just been hard to get ahold of you, but I wanted to know what your world looked like, from your own mouth. What it'd look like if you win, and how you feel about the competition.
Your name came up in the last trial, and you were innocent - but it was hard to say anything in your favor.
[Whatever. He guesses that because nobody can defend him at trials regardless of his innocence, he should maybe make it clear that he's just a snob and not, like, morally bankrupt.]
My ideal world is all about the three f's: fun, freedom, and frivolity. Everyone's comfortable, everyone's happy, so what's not to love about the idea? Am I willing to go pretty far to win this thing? Yeah, I would, because I'm a winner. Am I about to order my disloyal-proving following to go around murdering all the competition to get there? Come on, nobody's that heartless.
[is he really a better diplomat when this nearly went belly-up, like.
anyway his expression does seem to soften a little bit at that, something less apprehensive. is it real? who knows, not senri. though at least he can admit that this is good news.]
Mm, I'd like to hope so too, Indulgence-san. I guess that's why I'm trying to ask as many people as I can... Do you think any of the other gods would resort to that? We know that wasn't the case this past week, but for the future....
[please tell him indulgence is a gossip like other rich people he hates]
[Geez. It's worse than Sasuke thought. The Three Fs? He shouldn't have ever agreed to this with Senri. He wants to die? Kill him, thanks. He couldn't stand for a world to be so disorganized. There's no structure.
Rather than irritable, he now looks judgemental. But at least he doesn't say anything. Yet.]
Well, tch--yeah, duh. I mean, if nothing else we have a god named Ruin. Now I'm not saying she doesn't have her charms, because...
[He draws a blank. He's too picky.]
Anyway, the point is that she has that name for a reason, so if she wants to win, of course she's going to encourage or outright order her followers to help kill her way to the top. Sure, maybe not now, but if you ask me it's a plain inevitability. Aside from her? Cunning.
[senri glances to sasuke briefly, and since he's standing so close by, senri's just going to lightly hipcheck him because he needs to fucking train his face into something less openly judgy.
he does this while still paying attention to indulgence, so he hopes he can get away with it]
Oh yeah - I've heard those names come up too. I mean... obviously we don't want them to win and all - but if they do, what do you think the Pantheon would look like? They'd be ruling over the rest of you, right?
What proof do any of us have? Any of us can point fingers at any of us. Some won't, some will, and some may or may not. It's all distrustful, it's all up in the air, it's all up to you to choose your best option.
[Which, he would argue, is him, but he's not enough of a dolt to see where he's NOT WANTED so he's just going to be indignant instead.]
Whoever wins gets to boss the rest of us around, and we get to cater to their image of what the world should be like. Which means, mostly, that most of the people who want to win are going to make everything boring. For some of them, though, it's prooobably safe to say it wouldn't be quite so pretty.
WEEK 2
Oh, but there's more, because when Indulgence sees Sasuke, he lets out a bleat of laughter.]
Ha! What happened to you? You look like a cat that's just been unwillingly assaulted by a groomer. [He points a lazy hand at Senri.] Aaaand I'm guessing you would be that groomer.
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senri has no fucking clue how this happened. he wishes he had even the slightest understanding. he was actually decently nervous but now he's just
losing his goddamn mind in laughter because dragging sasuke is his favorite olympic sport, and then he grins back at the god before giving a dramatic bow as if he was on a stage]
I worked with what I had.
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Immediately, Sasuke regrets this and, immediately, he wants to leave. One hand balls into a fist at his side. His expression is utterly sour, not matching the fitted and sleek outfit Senri managed to con him into.
Lifting a foot, he shoves it against Senri's ass in hopes the orange idiot ends up on the ground.] Knock it off, idiot. [Stop helping the god make fun of him?!?! WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON, SENRI NITO.]
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Well, you had the right idea, just don't worry about being so stuffy next time. Looks only impress me if you're trying to get me in the sack and, gotta tell you, not feeling it here.
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[HE DID NOT COME HERE TO BE PART OF A COMEDY DUO!!
but also, even as senri straightens up he can't help but note - ] You remind me of someone...
[and he plasters the smile on again]
Even so, thank you for gracing us with your time. ♪ I'm sure you've been very busy with the game, of course.
[this is like 300x nicer than senri was being to sasuke even 2 minutes ago, this fakeass bitch]
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[Everyone is using slang he doesn't understand..............
Also, yeah, this is very fake. Cursed fake. Sasuke gives Senri a Look that clearly says Sycophant. Why is he stuck with the boke part of the duo.] He isn't stupid, Nito. [Maybe he's stupid? What does Sasuke know.] Talk to him normally.
[Geez. He glances back at Indulgence, so glad the god stopped posing with the twink leg.]
We're here to ask you questions.
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[He means that not in the way it comes out but I mean, uh, whatever. Suddenly, Indulgence has one of the bottles of alcohol that had been pilfered as an offering from this very Parlor and is trying very hard to wrench the cork out of it.]
Shoot away, compadre.
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I'll help with that, super charming and endlessly gracious, Indulgence-san!
[he's going to like. go back to the bar and get a bottle opener? dude,]
Fire away, Uchiha. [and he shoots sasuke a look] Respectfully.
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Nevermind. He’s stupid.
[Well. Failed the first go.
Sasuke regrets being stuck between these two idiots. Naruto! is! enough! Why does he have Senri and Indulgence, too?] What kind of world are you planning to create if you win? [Actually... he doesn’t think he wants to know. He really doesn’t want to know at all. He is already preparing himself to hear some kind of bullshit.]
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Excuse me? You might wanna speak up, I'm reasonably hard of hearing under this mask, because I'm preeetty sure we're throwing names around that aren't altogether called for. Now, considering you wanted to see me, I'm guessing that's not the case. Am I right?
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he's never found something as quickly as he found the corkscrew in the bar so that he can book it back over, bowing his head even as he approaches and senri thinks again about how much he hates rich people, he thinks about how much he hates snobs like this but that doesn't read on his face for even a second as he speaks up - ]
Pardon my brief interruption but -
You're suuuuper right, Indulgence-san! I'm sure he was talking about me, he calls me stupid all the time.
There's no way that he could've been referring to you, someone so great and powerful that you could probably strike us where we stand. [HEAR THAT, SASUKE] Not that you would - you're so kind and generous, I'm sure!
[his internal monologue is just AAAAAAAAAAAAAA ftr]
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No. [Reaching out, he bunches his fingers into the back of Senri’s clothes and yanks Senri upright.] I was talking to you. [did you forget he fought a god senri rip] You’re just a god. I’m not going to pretend like I owe you anything. Nito doesn’t owe you anything either. All of you owe us. We agreed to play your game for you. Without us, you would be squabbling amongst yourselves like chickens.
I’m returning the respect I received when I came in. I can do this easy, but I won’t kiss your feet. [He finally releases Senri’s clothes.] Nito wanted to see you, but you wouldn’t answer him, so I agreed to help. I don’t care either way. So answer Nito’s questions, and I won’t say another word.
Indulge him.
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[Indulgence's voice loses the playfulness it had had not too long ago, one foot drumming against his knee.]
I don't know what kind of lies your friend here's been filling your head with, but believe you me, this is the first time I've ever received an offering from either of you.
[Suddenly, he jumps down to his feet on the floor, shoving his hands into folds in his robes.]
Go ahead and talk a big game, but let's not make up stories.
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what he hates the most is the swirling feeling in his stomach, of gratitude mixed with irritation.
yet none of it shows on his face - there's a look of surprise and a stilted, lost:] Did I - miscount my cakes...?
[he's been yanked upright and he blinks a few times - ]
Sorry. [he's not really sure he's apologizing to, but he'll say it anyway] Um - really sorry.
Indulgence-san, is it... okay if we still ask questions? Or -
[is this too much of a disaster and is sasuke about to deck him anyway]
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Later. [Low enough to hopefully make Senri's blood crawl.] Ask them anyway. [He said he wouldn't say anything else and, for now, he holds true to his promise. Countdown to the next time Sasuke gets mad and talks.]
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[Indulgence taps a foot, like one step away from judge judy giffing.]
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the first is a bone-deep panic that the second he walks out of here he's going to get stabbed so fucking fast.
the second is oh my god i fucking hate rich people
but he does take a second to choose his words carefully, trying to keep a pulse of truth in them without over the top flattery]
.... it's just been hard to get ahold of you, but I wanted to know what your world looked like, from your own mouth. What it'd look like if you win, and how you feel about the competition.
Your name came up in the last trial, and you were innocent - but it was hard to say anything in your favor.
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It gives Indulgence room to grace them with an answer, if desired.
THANK GOD FOR SENRI WHO IS A BETTER DIPLOMAT THAN HIM]
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[Whatever. He guesses that because nobody can defend him at trials regardless of his innocence, he should maybe make it clear that he's just a snob and not, like, morally bankrupt.]
My ideal world is all about the three f's: fun, freedom, and frivolity. Everyone's comfortable, everyone's happy, so what's not to love about the idea? Am I willing to go pretty far to win this thing? Yeah, I would, because I'm a winner. Am I about to order my disloyal-proving following to go around murdering all the competition to get there? Come on, nobody's that heartless.
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anyway his expression does seem to soften a little bit at that, something less apprehensive. is it real? who knows, not senri. though at least he can admit that this is good news.]
Mm, I'd like to hope so too, Indulgence-san. I guess that's why I'm trying to ask as many people as I can... Do you think any of the other gods would resort to that? We know that wasn't the case this past week, but for the future....
[please tell him indulgence is a gossip like other rich people he hates]
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Rather than irritable, he now looks judgemental. But at least he doesn't say anything. Yet.]
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[He draws a blank. He's too picky.]
Anyway, the point is that she has that name for a reason, so if she wants to win, of course she's going to encourage or outright order her followers to help kill her way to the top. Sure, maybe not now, but if you ask me it's a plain inevitability. Aside from her? Cunning.
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he does this while still paying attention to indulgence, so he hopes he can get away with it]
Oh yeah - I've heard those names come up too. I mean... obviously we don't want them to win and all - but if they do, what do you think the Pantheon would look like? They'd be ruling over the rest of you, right?
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What proof do we have to trust what you say when you also want to win?
[he tried so hard and got so far but in the end at least it wasnt rud... maybe it was a little rude. A FAIR QUESTION ALRIGHT]
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[Which, he would argue, is him, but he's not enough of a dolt to see where he's NOT WANTED so he's just going to be indignant instead.]
Whoever wins gets to boss the rest of us around, and we get to cater to their image of what the world should be like. Which means, mostly, that most of the people who want to win are going to make everything boring. For some of them, though, it's prooobably safe to say it wouldn't be quite so pretty.
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