I think I'm the kind of person that can be nice, but I have things I want to accomplish. Sometimes that means doing things people might not find so nice.
[....] Yeah, we do. And I'll figure it out later. My own goals are way more important than playing nice with the other gods in this competition.
[The words are there, but the bite to them isn't.] ...and besides, there's no guarantee that the people I get close to are going to continue having the same goals as me as the game progresses and that they won't turn on me. So I'm cutting out the middle step. What's wrong with that?
[ . . . hm. senri nods at that, thinking about it.]
... Ray-kun treated me like that for a little bit, I think. Because it's hard to trust people, no matter how nice they are at first. I... can get what you're saying too.
But... I dunno. I think Bambi and Dizzy both really like you - and they'd rather get along with you. I've been learning how to make real bonds with people in this competition too, and I get a little surprised when they'll listen to me just because they trust me.
Charisma over betrayal as a tactic, maybe?
You're not as scary as I thought you'd be... but you're another person that I think is trying to play a game all by yourself, even though relationships with other people could make things a lot easier?
[A snort.] Do you ever consider the idea that maybe you don't actually know what you're talking about? I get what you're saying, and sure, that would apply for most situations and I'm all for you learning to make friends. Whatever. Congratulations.
...but there are some things you can't unlearn. Do you get that? No matter how many people say it, or how many people "like me" or whatever. Relationships with people are things that can be used against you, so I'm keeping those separate from the game.
They can help you, can't they? Like... I started with Cheri, and I want to do everything I can for Cheri - but learning about all the gods, now I want to do what I can for all of you instead of just being loyal to one. I know I have to pick eventually, but I think it'll save a lot of heartache until then....
[he shakes his head]
I'm just worried. Bambi appealed to everyone by really being vulnerable - but it's... kind of just a bandaid, you know?
...and just how far are you willing to go? You can't help everyone, Senri. It'd be wise of you to learn that. You're gonna have to pick sooner than later.
... far enough so that I can try to keep too many people from being sad. I know it's vague, but I think pretending that I can easily choose people to save and people I won't bother to is too cruel for me.
In your case, I'd rather that you not be hurt - and still be happy with whatever world you all end up with.
You'd be surprised. [But okay.] The thing is, you can't always make everyone happy. Someone else's happiness is always gonna be in the way of somebody else's. In the end, we're all going to be stuck together and ruling a new world, and we can figure out how to work together, but what do you think is worse? Ruling a world where you lost a competition on your own merit? Or losing a contest knowing someone tried to make you promises and they were broken while trying to make someone else happy?
But that's... I really don't think everyone's worlds are even that different is the thing. Maybe that's what I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around - but I like the idea that you and Piety have about balance.
...yeah. I do, too. [And he might only admit that sometimes.] The ideas might be similar but it's a bunch of clashing personalities trying to figure out how to make it work. You think you're confused? Try being a part of this pantheon.
It might be. But at least I've got more experience than the rest of them, I think. [A shrug.] When you're all gone we'll have to make all of our own decisions anyway.
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I think I'm the kind of person that can be nice, but I have things I want to accomplish. Sometimes that means doing things people might not find so nice.
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[senri's been a bitch for his own sake before, maybe not murder but,,]
Does that mean you have a hard time trusting people to have your back too?
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[...ganba, Senri.] I can take care of myself, and that's what I'll keep doing.
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... I guess that is what makes you Cunning.
But I think it matters... to figure out what kind of people are here, and to be able to support each other...
At least for all you gods - you need to share the world after, right?
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[The words are there, but the bite to them isn't.] ...and besides, there's no guarantee that the people I get close to are going to continue having the same goals as me as the game progresses and that they won't turn on me. So I'm cutting out the middle step. What's wrong with that?
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... Ray-kun treated me like that for a little bit, I think. Because it's hard to trust people, no matter how nice they are at first. I... can get what you're saying too.
But... I dunno. I think Bambi and Dizzy both really like you - and they'd rather get along with you. I've been learning how to make real bonds with people in this competition too, and I get a little surprised when they'll listen to me just because they trust me.
Charisma over betrayal as a tactic, maybe?
You're not as scary as I thought you'd be... but you're another person that I think is trying to play a game all by yourself, even though relationships with other people could make things a lot easier?
[er - ] But I mean, that's just what I think...
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...but there are some things you can't unlearn. Do you get that? No matter how many people say it, or how many people "like me" or whatever. Relationships with people are things that can be used against you, so I'm keeping those separate from the game.
Go ahead. Tell me why that's a bad idea.
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[he shakes his head]
I'm just worried. Bambi appealed to everyone by really being vulnerable - but it's... kind of just a bandaid, you know?
I'd rather work with you than argue anyway.
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...and just how far are you willing to go? You can't help everyone, Senri. It'd be wise of you to learn that. You're gonna have to pick sooner than later.
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... far enough so that I can try to keep too many people from being sad. I know it's vague, but I think pretending that I can easily choose people to save and people I won't bother to is too cruel for me.
In your case, I'd rather that you not be hurt - and still be happy with whatever world you all end up with.
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Sure. Who'd turn down advice from a god?
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.... you have a point.
I know you do.
But that's... I really don't think everyone's worlds are even that different is the thing. Maybe that's what I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around - but I like the idea that you and Piety have about balance.
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[????]
I wish you all the best once I'm gone - but I've been saying that I think being a god sounds like a loooot of work.
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