[ . . . . and senri just winces quietly and frowns.]
... thanks for the apology... I don't know if I deserve it, but I appreciate getting one. And I am sorry too - I don't want you to think that I think little of you...
It's been stressful but - you know that a lot of people believe in you, right? When I was trying to figure out what to do in the game, I thought that since I'm flexible, I could go to any god and try to win. But Taka and Ray-kun were the ones who told me that we should think about leaving behind the best possible world, and that meant the best leader, even if that god didn't have a lot of followers at the time.
And the thing is that I agree with them... I believe in balance more than anything else, and I think others would too. It's an easy message to spread, because it's one where a lot of people win.
If you think you made a mistake... we can keep trying to make it better. We've pulled off a lot of crazy things in a short amount of time - so if you feel that way, I want to work with you.
You don't have to be sorry - we can still win, you know? But only if you want to.
It must sound silly...that I can believe in everyone except for myself. There's still a lot that I have to learn, too, so I know that...it's always been easier for me to defer to others when they speak confidently.
[Mistakes are normal, he knows, but when he makes them...it's hard not to feel small.]
I was raised to believe that if I wasn't perfect, I'd be killed, so when I get nervous I may act impulsively, trying to solve things myself. I've always had that problem--I go out of my way and put myself in bad positions until I'm scolded.
[But that said...]
I'm sorry. I will accept you, and anyone else. Your belief in me, and your confidence that I can do this. If my winning won't cause any problems for anyone, any anger or distress...then I have no reason to reject the idea.
... we can talk about it... I'll talk to the other people, and see what we can organize. I don't want you to feel like you're forced into it either - I want to make sure that you're happy. I want all the gods to be happy, just as much as I want as many people to get their wishes as possible - without being reckless, or risking anyone's safety.
[but that's just senri being greedy, chasing after a happily ever after that doesn't exist, but he'll at least pretend it does until he can't anymore]
But... it's okay to not be perfect, and it's okay to make mistakes. People might get mad for a little bit, but they'll - I told Bambi this too... [and he just offers up a smile] But they'll come back together, apologize, and everyone can still be friends.
I do believe you mean well... I still believe in you - and I'll be really excited for you to be able to learn to believe in yourself. Other people see something in you for a reason. I promise their faith isn't mistaken.
Thank you, Senri. It really does mean so much to me. More than I can really express properly. I know I haven't done a good job of earning anyone's confidence, but...I'll do my best not to let you down anymore.
[In a smaller voice:]
I believe in what you've told me. What Ishikirimaru has assured me. And what Luke has always seen, even when I can't.
[ . . . and senri is just sighing quietly, running a hand through his hair]
... I don't know. I think you've done well. I'm... you know, I've been telling people that I'm pretty easy. I can go to a lot of gods - but I think that's why it's even more important that the people who can't make connections with people.
You got both Ray-kun and Taka's attention and respect, just by being you. Same with Sasuke.
Give yourself a little more credit, day by day. I'm sure you can do it. It's all about us changing, right?
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no subject
... thanks for the apology... I don't know if I deserve it, but I appreciate getting one. And I am sorry too - I don't want you to think that I think little of you...
It's been stressful but - you know that a lot of people believe in you, right? When I was trying to figure out what to do in the game, I thought that since I'm flexible, I could go to any god and try to win. But Taka and Ray-kun were the ones who told me that we should think about leaving behind the best possible world, and that meant the best leader, even if that god didn't have a lot of followers at the time.
And the thing is that I agree with them... I believe in balance more than anything else, and I think others would too. It's an easy message to spread, because it's one where a lot of people win.
If you think you made a mistake... we can keep trying to make it better. We've pulled off a lot of crazy things in a short amount of time - so if you feel that way, I want to work with you.
You don't have to be sorry - we can still win, you know? But only if you want to.
no subject
[Mistakes are normal, he knows, but when he makes them...it's hard not to feel small.]
I was raised to believe that if I wasn't perfect, I'd be killed, so when I get nervous I may act impulsively, trying to solve things myself. I've always had that problem--I go out of my way and put myself in bad positions until I'm scolded.
[But that said...]
I'm sorry. I will accept you, and anyone else. Your belief in me, and your confidence that I can do this. If my winning won't cause any problems for anyone, any anger or distress...then I have no reason to reject the idea.
no subject
[but that's just senri being greedy, chasing after a happily ever after that doesn't exist, but he'll at least pretend it does until he can't anymore]
But... it's okay to not be perfect, and it's okay to make mistakes. People might get mad for a little bit, but they'll - I told Bambi this too... [and he just offers up a smile] But they'll come back together, apologize, and everyone can still be friends.
I do believe you mean well... I still believe in you - and I'll be really excited for you to be able to learn to believe in yourself. Other people see something in you for a reason. I promise their faith isn't mistaken.
no subject
[In a smaller voice:]
I believe in what you've told me. What Ishikirimaru has assured me. And what Luke has always seen, even when I can't.
no subject
... I don't know. I think you've done well. I'm... you know, I've been telling people that I'm pretty easy. I can go to a lot of gods - but I think that's why it's even more important that the people who can't make connections with people.
You got both Ray-kun and Taka's attention and respect, just by being you. Same with Sasuke.
Give yourself a little more credit, day by day. I'm sure you can do it. It's all about us changing, right?
no subject
I suppose...I do tend to help others with their own development without leaving much time for myself.
[He looks down at his feet, feeling a little ashamed.]
I'll have to catch up.