[something distant and familiar tugs at senri's memory when he hears tamaki say 'perhaps it's safer not to form connections' but he doesn't let it linger. instead he just laughs quietly, a soft and fond noise, as he lets himself lean into tamaki's touch.
the hand that was in tamaki's hair moves only so that he can cup his cheek in return, brushing away at tear tracks with his thumb as he offers him a soft smile]
.... 'tis better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.
[he recites it gently, but certainly]
I've said it to a few people here... ['about you' is what he doesn't say] but I truly believe it. Even if it's difficult. Even if I have to go home soon, and I have to know what I don't get to have anymore... I would rather live in that feeling, and be able to recount all the times we've been able to laugh, or smile together, than to have missed out on those chances.
I don't want you to become a person that's afraid of chasing after what you want, of reaching out to people... because as many times as I might say that I like to have your attention to myself -
The world would be so much darker without people like you, just as you are, reaching out to people who don't even know how much they need you.
...it's what I usually tell myself, yes. [A philosophy he agrees with and understands.] I would rather think of the happy moments than the sad ones that broke us apart, but sometimes it's unexpected.
...I don't think I could ever bring myself to truly stop reaching out to people, but there's always the risk. I understand that now, but even knowing that I think it's worth it. I just wish it wasn't so soon. I'm happiest when other people are happy, so I want to reach as many as I can.
["Even at my own expense" is implied even if it's unsaid.]
...thank you, Senri. [There's a soft laugh.] Sorry for troubling you.
[senri settles for quietly shaking his head at that, though not enough to pull away from tamaki's touch. he lets his own hand trace down tamaki's cheek before settling against the curve of his jaw]
Please don't say sorry, when I asked you to tell me. When, even though I'm sharing your sadness with you, I'm really happy to know that you aren't holding it by yourself anymore. I don't want you to have to...
[ . . . ]
It's okay - to want more time. I want more time, too. Even if we might not get what we want... it's not wrong to hold the hope in your heart anyway.
[He leans into Senri's hand, horribly fond and a little broken but comfortable this way.]
I know. I know, it's…difficult, I think, to share these things. Because I don't want people to be sad because of me. But I can try, I guess. [There's a smile.] I believe that's what I should be saying to you, however.
[senri will just brush his thumb against tamaki's cheek as he gives him a smile, thoughtful and sincere]
... I'd be sadder if you kept it to yourself, Tamaki. [without bothering with a nickname] So... please let me carry it with you, even if we aren't able to find answers. I just don't want you to feel like you're a burden.
[Tell that to you boyfriend five days in the future, Senri.]
I don't know if I can tell Mizuki-san everything either. They don't need to trouble themselves with these things in addition to their own worries. But...thank you for understanding.
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the hand that was in tamaki's hair moves only so that he can cup his cheek in return, brushing away at tear tracks with his thumb as he offers him a soft smile]
.... 'tis better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.
[he recites it gently, but certainly]
I've said it to a few people here... ['about you' is what he doesn't say] but I truly believe it. Even if it's difficult. Even if I have to go home soon, and I have to know what I don't get to have anymore... I would rather live in that feeling, and be able to recount all the times we've been able to laugh, or smile together, than to have missed out on those chances.
I don't want you to become a person that's afraid of chasing after what you want, of reaching out to people... because as many times as I might say that I like to have your attention to myself -
The world would be so much darker without people like you, just as you are, reaching out to people who don't even know how much they need you.
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...I don't think I could ever bring myself to truly stop reaching out to people, but there's always the risk. I understand that now, but even knowing that I think it's worth it. I just wish it wasn't so soon. I'm happiest when other people are happy, so I want to reach as many as I can.
["Even at my own expense" is implied even if it's unsaid.]
...thank you, Senri. [There's a soft laugh.] Sorry for troubling you.
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Please don't say sorry, when I asked you to tell me. When, even though I'm sharing your sadness with you, I'm really happy to know that you aren't holding it by yourself anymore. I don't want you to have to...
[ . . . ]
It's okay - to want more time. I want more time, too. Even if we might not get what we want... it's not wrong to hold the hope in your heart anyway.
It's hope that drives people forward, after all.
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I know. I know, it's…difficult, I think, to share these things. Because I don't want people to be sad because of me. But I can try, I guess. [There's a smile.] I believe that's what I should be saying to you, however.
[That's a very Tamaki line, thanks.]
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... I'd be sadder if you kept it to yourself, Tamaki. [without bothering with a nickname] So... please let me carry it with you, even if we aren't able to find answers. I just don't want you to feel like you're a burden.
You're never a burden to me.
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Thank you...for everything. I think you've once again underestimated yourself.
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... I'm learning. Everyday.
I think that's all it is... and we can learn together, as much as you want.
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[easily]
... It's hard to let people in that much. If it's just me, or Mizuki-san... I'll understand. Old habits are hard to break, too.
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I don't know if I can tell Mizuki-san everything either. They don't need to trouble themselves with these things in addition to their own worries. But...thank you for understanding.
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but senri will just blink at that before just moving to brush some of tamaki's hair out of his face fondly]
... okay.
But in exchange, please make sure to be honest with me.
I'll keep being honest with you too.
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..it will be alright.