[ The longer this goes on, the more he seems to struggle with it. The reason for his quiet towards the end of the trial, never actually approaching Piety for a question, trying to sort out his thoughts to himself up until the very last moment possible... ]
I knew I should have voted for Love. I knew that as surely as anyone else did. But I just ... I couldn't do that to them.
[ His jaw tightens; he swallows. ] For a long time I thought of simply putting in my own name. I have no idea what would have happened to me if I did. So, in the end, I chose you... I made you a scapegoat for my cowardice. As far as I'm concerned, even if things turned out fine, what I did was unforgiveable. [ Yu will rest his forehead in his palm, looking drawn. This was what was truly bothering him post trial 1. Not arguing with Senri (though it did, a little), not even arguing with Itachi (though it did, a lot). The worst of it was always this: the lie he told himself to connect Itachi and Piety, his desperation to spare Love his vote, and his eventual choice to spare himself from unknown fate.
It's been tearing his conscience to pieces for days, not that he ever lets anyone in far enough to see it. ]
[There's a silence following the emotional force of Yu's admission, and finally after a long moment, Piety stands, bridging the gap between them, and places a hand on his shoulder. The god's hand is gentle and small, and there's an overall calming aura about them.]
You aren't a coward. You're loyal. You're deeply kind. Never doubt these things.
[ ... he hadn't meant to come in here and spill his guts like this. He'd wanted to apologize, not make the god feel sorry for him. His head jerks up when Piety walks over, and the expression on his face is complicated indeed when the god lays a hand on his shoulder.
Yu takes a breath, and ... lets it out in a gusty sigh, his head hanging between his shoulders for a moment. ]
I'm sorry for this, too. Making you comfort me for my own mistake. [ But he'll look up again with a hangdog smile. ] You're very understanding. Thank you.
Please, don't be so hard on yourself. Everyone is entitled to their emotions--in fact, it makes them stronger. And besides, I'm happy to lend a supporting hand whenever I'm able!
[Up close like this, despite the way that Piety carries themself, despite the elevated manner of speech, it's more obvious just how young they seem to be, underneath those decorations.]
If I can in any way make you feel better about what happened, I'm here to listen any time.
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no subject
[ The longer this goes on, the more he seems to struggle with it. The reason for his quiet towards the end of the trial, never actually approaching Piety for a question, trying to sort out his thoughts to himself up until the very last moment possible... ]
I knew I should have voted for Love. I knew that as surely as anyone else did. But I just ... I couldn't do that to them.
[ His jaw tightens; he swallows. ] For a long time I thought of simply putting in my own name. I have no idea what would have happened to me if I did. So, in the end, I chose you... I made you a scapegoat for my cowardice. As far as I'm concerned, even if things turned out fine, what I did was unforgiveable. [ Yu will rest his forehead in his palm, looking drawn. This was what was truly bothering him post trial 1. Not arguing with Senri (though it did, a little), not even arguing with Itachi (though it did, a lot). The worst of it was always this: the lie he told himself to connect Itachi and Piety, his desperation to spare Love his vote, and his eventual choice to spare himself from unknown fate.
It's been tearing his conscience to pieces for days, not that he ever lets anyone in far enough to see it. ]
no subject
You aren't a coward. You're loyal. You're deeply kind. Never doubt these things.
no subject
Yu takes a breath, and ... lets it out in a gusty sigh, his head hanging between his shoulders for a moment. ]
I'm sorry for this, too. Making you comfort me for my own mistake. [ But he'll look up again with a hangdog smile. ] You're very understanding. Thank you.
no subject
[Up close like this, despite the way that Piety carries themself, despite the elevated manner of speech, it's more obvious just how young they seem to be, underneath those decorations.]
If I can in any way make you feel better about what happened, I'm here to listen any time.
no subject
All I'd like is to get to know you, [ he'll say honestly. ] What sort of person you are.