[He closes his eyes, as Ion wraps his arms around him, breathing in—and out, in a long, raggedy exhale.]
It's okay.
[It was easy to let go, like this—try and forget this whole morning. Pretend the trial wasn't going to happen tomorrow. Forget everything he already knew.]
I don't even know what I want to do. I don't know how to... I don't know what my heart wants.
[Even saying it out loud sounds stupid. His heart? What did that even mean? It's frustrating, and it's hard not to show it even more. But letting go now would mean... thinking about...
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It's okay.
[It was easy to let go, like this—try and forget this whole morning. Pretend the trial wasn't going to happen tomorrow. Forget everything he already knew.]
I'm okay.
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[Ion shakes his head just slightly.]
Take...all of the time you need.
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[he blurts it out, apropos of nothing, voice tired and numb.]
I don't even know why.
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[Ion's voice is a soft, sad whisper.]
Luke, I'm sorry.
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[his shoulders fall a little more]
I tried to ask him some questions, but... I don't know, he couldn't answer them at all. What am I supposed to do?
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[He shakes his head.]
I'm sorry, Luke. The most you can do is decide what...your heart tells you to do with what you know, regardless of how much it may hurt.
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It's not helpful.
But it's not wrong, either.]
I don't even know what I want to do. I don't know how to... I don't know what my heart wants.
[Even saying it out loud sounds stupid. His heart? What did that even mean? It's frustrating, and it's hard not to show it even more. But letting go now would mean... thinking about...
...]
I have to decide before tomorrow no matter what.