GODLY AUDIENCES - TAKAOMI SHISHIMARU

[divus]

Comments

[divus]

...you're good at keeping secrets, aren't you? Keep this one. Things absolutely changed for me and it's kind of been freaking me out.

[bakaomi]

[ he blinks in surprise ]

Really?

[divus]

Yeah. My ideas for the world and everything haven't changed or anything, but approaching things and motivations might've.

...ever come up with a plan and go through with it because you think it's gonna be the end of the line, but then things turn out differently and you have to live past what you planned for? It's sorta like that. I've had more time than I wanted to actually think about things.

[bakaomi]

... a little.

[ he assumes both of their contexts are different though. ]

It makes sense. No matter how much you prepare, sometimes things just happen and you have to... figure things out as you go.

[divus]

I didn't think I'd have to figure out how to do things after things in my world. I had a plan, and yeah, fine, becoming a god wasn't as easy as I assumed it'd be. But it was better than the original plan.

[...] ...clarity. That's what this is, and that's the weird part about it. I want to create a fair and good world, but I keep remembering things I've been forgetting.

[bakaomi]

[ he reaches out for another slice of pizza, but he nibbles at it more than anything. ]

Do you think it's helping?

[ because he knows that what the gods have learned while here have been varying greatly, and some lessons have been more positive than others. ]

[divus]

[There's a brief time he's considering that.]

...I don't regret what choice I made when I voted to make this a killing game, because you guys still get to come back and that's a luckier situation than some people ever get. But I think if I'd known then what I know now I would've thought about it a little more before immediately backing Ruin's suggestion.

[bakaomi]

... I'm still mad about that, but I can't be too upset because I agreed to come here.

[ he is just. so traumatized because he is the wrong genre for this. he was so unprepared for this level of bullshit. ]

But... in the end, I think there was more good than bad. The bad still sucked though. A lot.

[divus]

You did. ...but I get it. Sometimes you agree to stuff without realizing what the hell you're getting into. The bad sucks a lot. Dying sucks a lot. The whole thing kind of sucks a lot but if you're getting something good out of it maybe we didn't screw up that much.

[He takes another slice of pizza just because.] ...it's almost over. At least it's just a couple of months.

[bakaomi]

People can forget if they want, right?

[ since merriment had implied they could, a few weeks back. ]

[divus]

Yeah. It'd be kind of a dick move if we didn't give you that option. Thinking of taking it after all?

[bakaomi]

... nah.

[ if things had gone very, very differently, then maybe. but. ]

Senri would kill me. [ ... ] And I'm already enough of a coward without that.

[divus]

...yeah. You and me both. [Hm.] Can't say I'd blame anybody who did take the option. It's appealing, I get it. But it's a whole personal choice thing.

[bakaomi]

... how would it work if you got your wish? You'll just suddenly get what you want without remembering how it happened?

[divus]

Pretty sure if we can erase your memories, we could change them to think you earned it yourself somehow. But that's just a guess.

[bakaomi]

Ugh.

[ he'd be pissed, even if in this situation he would not know why he would be pissed ]

[divus]

...revival was partially my idea. So I could probably figure out the mechanics. I'm one of the only ones with any experience in a world where rebirth exists. So I figure if I take that same idea but without actually doing a full mindwipe...it'd work.

[But it's still stupid and he knows that.]

Makes me wonder how many of you are actually going to want to forget though.

[bakaomi]

I dunno... it's hard to tell what people are thinking.

[ that's more taka's fault than anything. he's not sure if he's particularly close to anyone enough to really be able to gauge that. ]

[divus]

I stopped trying after a while to be honest. [A shrug.]

...sort of hard to believe this thing's almost over. It's going to be a pretty close race to the end. [...] You're going to really stay with your god until the end?

[He doesn't sound like he cares one way or another, but he's curious.]

[bakaomi]

I want to.

[ he knows merriment isn't going to win, but... ]

I'll have to see what next week looks like. But... it's what I'll prefer.

[divus]

Loyal. [It's a thoughtful sort of tone.]

...even after everything, I think Guy might stick around. Everybody else is up in the air. You guys are gonna have to watch the numbers really close in the last week.

[bakaomi]

I have no idea what it'll look like at this point. This week is pretty even, but...

[ people are

so unloyal ]

[divus]

I know. [...] It's why I'm worried about Ambition.

[bakaomi]

[ he frowns ]

Why?

[divus]

You've seen the fluctuation in numbers, haven't you? Why wouldn't I be worried about that?